My phone rings. I love caller ID. I recognize my daughter's number, so I answer with a cheery, "Hey!" No one responds. Ahhh! This means I have a grandchild on the line. So I shift into Grammie mode. "Hi, sweetie! Who is this?" "Iss Ax!" "Hi, Alex. How are you?" "something unintelligible" "Did you have breakfast?" "YES!" "What did you have?" "something unintelligible" "Are you and Matthew playing?" "YES", then a long something unintelligible. "What are you--" "BYE". He's all done with me.
His mom comes on the line, laughing. "What did we just say" I ask her. She laughs again. "I don't know; I thought he was answering your questions."
So she and I start a conversation about the craziness of childrearing. We talk for about two minutes, then there is weeping in the background. "I'm sorry, sweetie, we don't have any plums. I offered you one but you didn't want it, so someone else ate it. You can have some tropical fruit if you're still hungry." Still weeping. "Ax" is not hungry for tropical fruit. He's only hungry for the plum he didn't want which is now in someone else's tummy. We talk for a few more minutes, and then..."ALEX! Get your tongue off that! Alexander, do not lick that! If your spit goes anywhere near that, I will put it away and you will not be allowed to play with it!" And there is more weeping.
We chat a few more minutes. The weeping is the background ceases. And we chat a little longer and then..."WHY ARE YOU NEKKID?! Mom, I gotta go." We hang up.
And I laugh and laugh. Being the mother of the nekkid child is serious work. Being the grandmother of the nekkid child is HIGH-larious!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
Yes it is hard work, and Matthew was the one screaming for the plum.It was in Alex's belly:)
I can totally hear what you're talking about. :) I know my mom is looking forward to being the one laughing at the nekkid kid rather than chasing him (or her) around the house. Approximately 20 more days!!
I would sort of like to give her another reason to laugh, but I'm scared. Petrified. Enough not to do it. Is this normal? Does this mean I'm not cut out for motherhood? Or maybe just not yet?
Totally normal! How could you not be a little scared of an event that will turn your life upside down and inside out in ways you can't even begin to understand or imagine. And yet, that moment will come when you want that more than anything else you can think of. Could be described as the hardest fun you'll ever have. :-)
And then... it had been so long since you blogged....
So I left another comment in an attempt to reel you back to the time suckage that is blogging....
I know your computer is a mess because of the remodeling, but come on, where are your priorities?
Yeah lady we know you are not that busy with your life:)
Take the plastic off your computer and give us a little something. We miss you!
Post a Comment